Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
