After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize