omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize