If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
