this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.