Nicole vs. Life
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...