I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
