Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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