I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize