This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
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I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
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Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
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