so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Randomize
