They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Randomize