What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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