Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Canadian or clown?