im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
