new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize