Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
