In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Randomize