he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
