i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
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