i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
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