He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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