dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
