the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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