Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
40s are totally the cure
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize