Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Damn victory sex feels great
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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