We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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