Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
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nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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