shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.