the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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