He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize