Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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