i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
