So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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