We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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