Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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