wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
