Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
