windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
