OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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