SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.