im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
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