I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
