the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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