And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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