I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
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