You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
