Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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