Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
