i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?