Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
