I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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