Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
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