dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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