There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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